Translation for Men

I know I have seen this somewhere before. But a friend posted it the other day, and I just thought it was sooo true and worth posting again. MJ thinks it is a joke and I can't convince him, that at least for living with me, these should be words to live by.

9 Words Women Use

1. Fine - This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.
2. Five Minutes - If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.
3. Nothing - This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with Nothing usually end in Fine.
4. Go Ahead - This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!
5. Loud Sigh - This is not actually a word, but it is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to #3 for the meaning of nothing.)
6. That’s Okay - This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. “That’s okay” means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.
7. Thanks - A woman is thanking you, do not question it or faint. Just say you’re welcome.
8. Whatever - Is a women’s way of saying FUCK YOU!
9. Don’t worry about it, I got it - Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but she is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking “What’s wrong?” For the woman’s response refer to #3.